362/365 Remaining Reticent... Well Mostly

A child grows up without asking permission. A child decides she wants a boyfriend without permission.

Those of us who love her stay close, but can hardly watch.

359/365 What Child is This?

In the background... In the arms of a boy. When I took this picture I'd intended to display the traditional Jewish Christmas celebration. Movies and take-out Chinese food. The amorous teenage embrace in the background is even more disturbing than the perturbed spouse in the foreground. Oy.

350/365 Did I ask for this?

Barely fifteen and head-0ver-heels for a boy we don't even know. "Do I have to be single forever, Mom?" she said (shouted). Forever? Yes, she's a little dramatic.

I bandaged her boo-boos, shielded her eyes from the sting of shampoo, and carried her on my shoulders when her little legs were tired. And all that was... maybe a week ago.

No. She's not single. She's at the center of a family that adores her. And we're not giving that up any time soon.

301/365 I love my daughter

Thanks for this photo, MJ!

I really do love her, but parenting sucks. It's not only about the loving. It's about being the gatekeeper, the banker, and the counselor. My daughter the infant was a lot of work (she never slept through the night), but it was sure easier back when all she needed was Mommy's warm arms and a kiss on the forehead. Whether she likes it or not, I plan to keep trying the hugs and kisses.

297/365 Recipe for a Teen Birthday Sleepover

3 Chick Flicks

2 trays baked ziti

1 case diet coke

2 dozen cupcakes

2 lbs M& Ms

1 bag each: Doritos, Cheetos, Fritos

Prepare ingredients mid afternoon. Add half a dozen friends. Warm thoroughly in hot tub. Finish with liberal dose of gossip and giggles.

292/365 New Routines to Come

So I was at school today. All day. As a teacher. Even though I'm unofficial, I figure the sooner I'm in there the better. Then I scooped up my girl at High School, and took her for an adjustment to the braces. Back at home dinner prepared by her Dad was quick and yummy. We shared laughs, stories of our days, and plans for upcoming auditions. Now my girl is onto practicing and homework. I'm catching up on business emails and blogging, then we're off to Chorale. Sure, I head out for some workshops tomorrow, but this is a preview of the day-to-day with the new job. I kinda' like it.

272/365 The Home Conservatory

Complete with metronome, music stand, and a music library with yellowing pages of my college rep and the crisp new possibilities of her young vocal studies, this is becoming a favorite place in the house. We have a sofa for spectators (human and cat) plenty of natural light, and fabulous acoustics thanks to high ceilings and wood floor. Though, to be truthful, a cave would be beautiful when filled with the sound of my daughter singing. When she is on, there are angels in the room.

271/365 Sweet and Sour Stomach

I have been craving it for days, a dish I normally avoid when taking in Chinese food. Tonight though, my stress level was high and the the delivery place was still open. This is a dish I shouldn't have at 2 PM, much less 10:30 at night. Attempting to allow food to fill the space left by a turmoil of emotion never works. The result is guilt on top of turmoil and a night of indigestion. The chicken didn't make the problems go away, and the sweet and sour sauce didn't miraculously change the difficult and delicate situation.

269/365 Preparations for a BFF

She studied and practiced for 4 1/2 hours today, so a visit and sleepover seems to be in order. We're going to Theatre Jax to take in The Importance of Being Earnest, and then we'll hit the redbox for a late night sleepover movie. If KF is coming we need to get her 2 favorite food groups: Ranch and Diet Coke. Hard work and good friends make for a great weekend.

266/365 Audio Readers Club

We finished Jay Asher's Thirteen Reasons Why on the way home from piano lessons this afternoon. While schlepping about has meant a lot of time in the car, we're loving sharing books. It makes the travel time productive and FUN! She even stops texting during the book. Thank goodness for Audible.com. Tonight I downloaded the next one, Before I Die, by Jenny Downham. Sounds a bit sad, but may have some levity, kind of like a teen "bucket list." Either way, I'll enjoy sharing it with my girl.

260/365 Riding 'Da Bus

SO proud of my girl, striking out in a new school on her own. She has to navigate her way through dozens of buses to find the right one, making her way in a school so far from home in a different county. She's been rather conscientious lately. Growing up so fast. It didn't help that her wonderful voice teacher, Dr. C, reminded me of how grown up she is, and how, before we know it, she'll be on her way to college. SLOW DOWN!

258/365 Tired Teen

When the alarm rings at 5:30 AM she is up right away, never complaining. We leave the house at 6:30 and she's back in the house by 4:50 PM (on days without lessons or extra-curriculars). Then we have homework, practicing, and gossip updates from the local high school. No wonder she's ready for bed by 9:15 PM. I thought she was asleep, but this kid is such a ham that the flash of the camera triggered the involuntary smile. Gotta' love her. I do!

253/365 It was my duty to photograph it

She sat in her car, devouring her frozen yogurt treat, though I don't know how she maintained her appetite. It was a grey Toyota somewhere underneath, but the exterior was mainly adorned with poop. Bird poop. Not just a little poop. The bumper had a UNF sticker, and I guess that the osprey mascot had its nest right over the car. It was paint-splatter-food-fight-mud-wrestler-all over the place poop. Either she pissed off the bird something awful, or she didn't notice that she had pulled into the aviary at the zoo.

I wanted desperately to photograph it for my loyal readership. Really, it was something to see. But the teenage daughter FREAKED. "That is the stupidest thing I ever heard. You are stupid and fricking crazy. You are NOT going to ask that girl to take a picture of her crap car. OMG Mom, No!" I think her head spun a 360. It would've been a journalistic scoop. A blogging first. Artistry and nature, all wrapped in one excrement-covered import. But my teen ruined my rush.

252/365 A Kiss For Dessert

It's quickly becoming a Wednesday tradition. Because the afternoon bus stop is only a couple of blocks from Grandma's house, and Grandma is off work midweek, it just makes sense to have dinner and some time together. We usually eat at Grandma's, then take in a game of Bananagrams or catch up on the latest Cash Cab. Today the schedule was a little different, with an early dismissal and a long audition at the high school. Chinese food, said the auditioner, and this was the perfect ending to the meal.

239/365 New Attitude?

When she forgot her student i.d. this morning, she was genuinely concerned. The agenda book was completed in all classes, and the B day homework was completed tonight, even though it isn't due until Monday. As I write this, the somewhat tuneful sounds of piano practicing are happening in the next room. The smile stayed on her face, even through 2 pages of Math and one page of Music Theory. This could be the start of something big.

236/365 Where's my baby?

She started the night in our bed last night, saying, "I always sleep the best with my Mommy." I rubbed her back until she was still. I slept fitfully, imagining her lost in the melee of magnet buses at unfamiliar high schools. It all went fine. She woke at 5:30 and was through glamorizing before 6. That left plenty of time for her "Baby Bagel" with cream cheese and sips of orange juice. She texted all the way to the high school, having little to say to me. When the time came to get out, she wanted me to wait with her and see that she found the right bus. I even helped her introduce herself to a nice girl, Kaitlyn, a visual arts major. They both like the front of the bus, they agreed, so let's sit together. The buses started pulling in, and she spotted #595 as it came around the corner. Boys with facial hair boarded that bus! She allowed me the picture, and even waved through the window as I walked off. I waited until I got to the car to cry.

235/365 Yep. I'm Old

The bags are packed. The lunch is made. The bus route and locker number are committed to memory. Tomorrow my daughter begins high school. It well may be that our little family unit only has 4 more years...

221/365 In My Day

Hers:

Notebook computer, iPod touch, iHome with remote, printer, scanner, digital camera, printer/scanner/copier, touch screen, web-enabled QWERTY keyboard wireless phone, cordless land line.

Mine:

Clock radio. Record player.

143/365 Belated Mother's Day Present

Today was the 8th grade dance. Sure, I thought it was ridiculous for the school to plan the dance right in the middle of the Memorial Day weekend. We had thought about taking a little road trip or visiting my sis in Tallahassee, but my girl's a social butterfly, and she couldn't live with the thought of a dance going on without her. So we endured the search for a dress, shelled out the bucks, gathered the necessary accessories, and pinky-swore that I'd do my best to fix her up with a snazzy 'do if she wouldn't fuss at me.

I think she looked like a million bucks, though I must say the vision of my daughter in a white sateen dress gave me a preview of the nausea I'd be enjoying on some other white-dress day in the future.

She and her goofy friends enjoyed the dance, then during the ride home she begged for a friend to spend the night. Well, Dad and Mom had planned to attend a grown-up party, some 30 minutes away, with some new friends and cast mates. But I thought about being a girl of 14. I would want to spend the night with a friend after the dance. So we're home now instead of partaking of libation and lively chatter. I scrambled some eggs and toasted some bagels for the starving debutantes and set them up with a movie for bedtime. Out of the blue, my girl gave me a hug and a very sincere "Thank you for the most awesome day. I love you Mommy."

Worth it all.

141/365 Dress Success

Dress shopping with my girl is hard work. Too busty for most Junior fashions, too petite for Ladies, too fussy for most stores, in general, it's a nightmare. Enter the Eighth Grade Dance. $15 tickets to go to the dance in the Junior High cafeteria, and anybody who's anybody will be there. Now we need a dress. The search has been underway for a few weeks, and we were about to give up and go with a not-so-springy red dress she wore to a New York Bar Mitzvah last year. A last ditch effort took us to the mall tonight. We struck out in Dillard's, Penney's, and Belk. We checked the boutiquey stores, even willing to overpay and have little selection. Nothing. That is nothing, unless I wanted my daughter to look like a streetwalker. Our last chance at 8:40. Sears. We scored the white number for the dance, two have-em-in-the-closet dresses for all occasions, and a lovely pair of silver sling-back shoes with a moderate heel (all on 50% off sale). Mom is the hero, the daughter is happy, and peace and harmony will be with us in our humble home. For now, anyway.