Wednesday, January 16, 2008

The love that might have been

It may not be obvious when checking the lax posting schedule on this blog, but my elife is too fast paced for me to look for a wifi hotspot and crank out the 6.5lb notebook. The Web has become such an integral part of my life, almost making up for the things that are getting harder and harder to remember. For example, the other day in the car, EJG and I were innocently crooning along to some vintage Stones. "OOh ooh ooh ooh ooh, o o o ooh, Ill come to your emotional rescue." Boy, that song brought us back. It reminded us of another Stones song of the same era. Another one with an extended round of oohs (were the guys too jacked up to think of real words?). In our minds, and as we hummed, we kept coming back to Emotional Rescue. Scratching the back of my brain, I pulled out another line, something about "Puerto Rican girls, dying to meet you," but we still came up short on the title. Arriving home, I entered "rolling stones puerto rican girls" into my Google homepage and in 0.09 seconds I was reviewing the lyrics to Miss You. 0.09 seconds and I had in front of me what 2 hours of brain squeezing couldn't deliver.

I also need PDA capabilities. My high tech life should be beyond sticky notes on the dashboard, in my wallet, or on my cell. The stickies remind me to add things to my high tech calendar the next time I have the thing powered up. Sure, I love the scheduling ease on Outlook, but what if the darned notebook is in its case? What was the address of that Holiday Inn I'm looking for? It's in the email, in my inbox. Pull over the rent-a-car along the Kennedy freeway, JSG, to power up the thing and wait in the Chicagoland traffic to boot and open the folder. Not the most efficient system.

Clearly I need an iPhone. That need drove me to visit the Apple store at the SJTC yesterday, where there was a not-so-friendly guy wearing the t-shirt and casual khaki uniform. He showed me the full demo, and then walked away to allow me some bonding time. With this shiny silver gem, the full capabilty of the internet, the ipod, and the PDA are available anywhere there's a cell phone signal. It's all I need and more. My wallet was throbbing with the anticipation of the big purchase, and my head was ignoring the fact that the mandatory AT&T phone service is redundant, since the family share plan we have with Verizon won't expire until October 2009. Nevermind the price. I had to have this, so I approached Unfriendly Apple Man to seal the deal. I asked him to show me how to access the GPS on this marvelous micromachine, and he laughed. Snickered, actually.

Sure, he can feel superior, because they have the sexiest toy on the market. But the mighty iPhone can't do what my 3 year old cell phone can. That is, get me turn-by-turn audio directions to the Detroit airport when I'm in the middle of a neighborhood in Livonia, Michigan. Or tell me the splits on my 7 mile run along the Black Creek Trail. Why doesn't it have GPS? When will GPS be coming? Smug Apple Man had no answers. He left me standing, wallet growing still and frugality regaining control, as he went on to sell half a dozen iPhones in the next 30 minutes.

Odd, though, that I'm experiencing a sense of loss for the life we might have had together.


CrazyAuntDeb said...

This brought me back a few years to when you first showed me your Ipod. The jealousy was too great and I ran out and bought my mini. It served me well - as my car still had a tape player. I remember seeing the song title fly across your screen and I asked you whether it could show the song lyrics as it played. Another "why can't it do this???" moment... We're really spoiled already, you know?

DiaBelo said...

I love how you link Emotional Rescue to google searches to technology rescue (yeah, what-up with the missing gps).

Cora Spondence said...

Once you get it in your hand and play with it, fingers flying over its surface, gliding ever so smoothly, obeying your every command...I believe you described it splendidly like it was that first hit of crack or that right out of the oven Krispy Kreme donut. Then, reality hits, no freakin' GPS? Such posers, those Applepeople. You were able to outrun the dogs----let them wait for your money until they give you everything you want and need!

MJ said...

I love how you took us all with you right to the edge. I was thinking, "Buy it! yea, buy it!" But I'm glad reason won out. I can't believe it doesnt have the GPS! Maybe in time. I guess it wasn't meant to me.

LJ said...

The iPhone talks a big game and then fails to deliver. There are no buttons on it and no voice recognition so you have to squint thorough the smudge marks on the not-clear-for-very-long screen to do anything. There's only a partial keyboard so forget about punctuation. The iPhone is a phone (restricted to AT&T service), an MP3 player, and an internet browser. What phone made after 2000 isn't? In the immortal words of The Flavor Flav, "Don't Believe the Hype"