Friday, June 20, 2008

His first sentence, announced while we boarded:

Welcome aboard flight 1851 with nonstop service from Florida's Jacksonville International Airport you have boarded a Boeing 757, a staple of Delta's trustworthy jet fleet as you find your seat and get settled I would like to welcome you aboard this flight my name is Ryan and I am the onboard leader for today's flight to our corporate headquarters located at the Hartsfield Jackson International Airport in sunny Hot-lanta Georgia along with our captain and co-pilot I will be serving you with Michelle and Clarissa, a top-rate Atlanta-based team we can assure your comfort and safety with our combined over 100 years of flying experience in just a few moments we will be briefing you with the safety information required by the FAA, and I encourage you to become familiar with the features of this aircraft as detailed on the safety information card located in the seatback pocket in front of you for now, please stow your luggage safely, remembering that all articles must fit completely in the overhead bin or beneath the seat in front of you bulkhead row passengers, those seated in the first row of each cabin, must stow all personal items leaving the area at and behind your feet completely free in case of the need for evacuation if you need assistance in stowing your articles please let a flight attendant know we will be happy to help you as you settle in for our short flight i wish offer you a sincere welcome aboard.

He never stopped until "buh-byed" at deplaning.


MJ said...

What a lesson in voice!

Cora Spondence said...

What a lesson in breath! Ryan must be allergic to pauses(I'll refrain from hauling out the dog pun that's dying to be used).

EJG said...

Ryan wanted to be a teacher, but the classes kept walking out on his lectures.

A plane offers him the perfect audience!

BJNR said...

Where's Naomi Campbell when you need her?